Manic Movie Magic: Top 5 Guilty Pleasure Movies

There comes a time in every critic’s life…wait I used this already. Umm…there comes a time in every college student’s life when your brain has been friend like an egg because of papers and exams. And I, dear readers, hit that wall yesterday.

But I can’t just not blog – it’s just not in my nature to leave any wandering eyes without something to read and/or laugh at. So instead, I’m going to take a cue from Lindsay Ellis, aka the Nostalgia Chick and reveal my deepest and more shameful secret – my own person guilty pleasures movie list.

Guys, on this very special Manic Movie Magic, it’s about to get ugly.

5) X-Men Origins: Wolverine

I’m just going to say it – I don’t see what is so bad about this movie. I have seen it  at least nine different times and enjoyed each one. It probably doesn’t help that I love Hugh Jackman and in my eyes he can do no wrong, but I genuinely don’t see what people dislike this film. The plot I thought was good, the directing is solid, the characters are fun, and it’s everything I wanted in this movie – Wolverine’s story. Sure, it might be one of the worst of the X-Men movie series, but just cause it’s at the bottom doesn’t make it bad. Honestly, I will own this on DVD someday. No one can stop me.

4) Bedazzled

A terrible remake, it follows the tale of a sadsack who makes a deal with the devil to try and get with this one girl in his office that he just can’t talk to. So, he goes through all the dumb wishes to try to win her affection before he figures out that no matter what, the devil can’t get you laid. It’s a silly movie, with a senseless plot, and all the same predictable twists and turns.

…but the scenarios are a ton of fun, and are very well designed and thought out. Elizabeth Hurley is in prime form as the sexy, sultry, and all over evil Satan, and hey, Brendan Frasier is fits really well into the role. The film is shiny, and comes to a somewhat satisfying ending, though it would have been fun to see the woobie just finally fall in the pit of eternal fire.

 

3) The New Guy

And here’s where the list starts getting downright embarrassing. For a year or two of my life, I loved this movie. I was 12. Maybe it’s the unfunny humor, the easily distinguishable stereotypes, or even jus the fact that it’s a weird amalgamation of every guy’s revenge daydreams. But something in there sort of stuck. The movie is overall made of stupid, which is why as a 12 year old, I loved it.

Hell if its on TV, I’m going to watch – no joke. The entire way through, unironically. And I have literally, LITERALLY no clue why. I just feel like this is what I wanted high school to be – a victory. What it ended up being was just one long emotional rollercoaster. But in the end, while the acting is bad, the writing cliché, and not-fancifl-enough-white-trashitude, I still think it’s an enjoyable watch.

 

2) Charlie’s Angels 2: Full Throttle

Don’t even get me started on this one. I mean, this is considered one of the worst blockbuster sequels to date, and it has three good actresses completely and totally failing. The plot is stupid, and a little rape-y to be honest, and Demi Moore looked like someone left her out to dry in the Sun too long.  I mean, the costumes and situations are beyond silly, and even Bill Murray knew better than to come back for this.

…but then there are some good ideas behind it. A bitter, revenge-seeking ex-Angel? A list of relocated persons up for sale to the people who got put in jail because of them? The idea of a tight group of friends falling apart? All pretty solid. The music was great, the cinematography pretty fun, and hell, even the dance number at the school reunion was adorable. I can’t help but like this movie cause I love the combo of Liu, Barrymore and Diaz – they have just great chemistry, and the action, however silly, is still topnotch.

 

1) Practical Magic

This movie is the lowest of the low. It’s plot is weird and contrived even for a romantic comedy, the main leads are somewhat miscast, and the writing and soundtrack is something you’d associate more with a paper-back romantic novel, not a blockbuster movie. It’s trashy, lame, poorly constructed…

…and I love it. I don’t know why! Maybe it’s the lovely colors and cinematography. Maybe it’s the fact that it does remind of paperback romance novels that I am way too proud to read. Maybe it’s just cause Sandra Bullock makes most movies better, and Nicole Kidman isn’t playing Nicole Kidman’s serious face. And it’s even so bad it’s got no camp-factor so all I feel watching it is the sweet, sickening syrup of shame every time its on TV.

Next week…well…who knows what going down next week. I may be a turnip for all I know. SURPRISE REVIEW IT IS!

 

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Starshine5050

As just a regular, hard-working work, often-stressing, procrastination-mastering history and journalism student, I often turn to the silver and small screens for relief, even though I'm only an average cinema-and-television loving viewer, commenting on what, and does not, makes good entertainment. I love horror everything - book, TV shows, games, movies - even though they frighten me terribly. I'm a long time believer of the old saying "When life gives you lemons, don't take life's lemons! Give the lemons back!" So, onward I go, returning lemons and logging an unhealthy amount of screen time for your enjoyment. So please be sure to read my stuff and let me know what you think, I'm alway looking to improve and be the best, most cynical critic I can be!

Latest posts by Starshine5050 (see all)

Starshine5050

As just a regular, hard-working work, often-stressing, procrastination-mastering history and journalism student, I often turn to the silver and small screens for relief, even though I'm only an average cinema-and-television loving viewer, commenting on what, and does not, makes good entertainment. I love horror everything - book, TV shows, games, movies - even though they frighten me terribly. I'm a long time believer of the old saying "When life gives you lemons, don't take life's lemons! Give the lemons back!" So, onward I go, returning lemons and logging an unhealthy amount of screen time for your enjoyment. So please be sure to read my stuff and let me know what you think, I'm alway looking to improve and be the best, most cynical critic I can be!

3 Comments:

  1. I have a huge problem with Wolverine because of the way they handled the characters. Logan and Sabretooth brothers? Deadpool as "Weapon XI?" Emma Frost as Kayla's sister? So many things wrong. This is also why I hated First Class; it's ok to take some liberties, but don't go changing some of the core parts of characters. Even with TDKR, I wish they chose a hispanic actor to play Bane.

    • Hardcore comic fans will obviously loathe many of the movie versions but as for me, I didn't mind most of them, except the obviously lame ones (Both Fantastic 4 movies, Elektra, Green Lantern just to name a few). The Wolverine movie was bad because many of the characters; roles made little sense. As for First Class, I'm not a HUGE X-Men fan so I don't follow the characters as religiously but I liked it.

      On to the list, Bedazzled is a silly, but fun movie. Wolverine was bad, both Charlie's Angels movies hurt my brain, I don't even remember watching the New Guy and I haven't seen the #1 movie.

      • I'm not a die-hard X-Men fan wither, but I do understand most of the mythos and backstory so I was little confused about the new roles but it was just a movie where I just threw my hands up and said "Okay movie, just do your own thing" In that respect I thought it that way it was good. There is still much shame to liking it though. First Class was a very good movie in my book.

        Yeah, I think Bedazzled is the most acceptable of this list. Practical Magic…I would just stay away unless you were super curious.

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