Final Fantasy 5 Four Job Fiesta 2012 Fridays Episode 5

Previously on Final Fantasy 5 Four Job Fiesta 2012 Fridays, I beat down the amazingly (and annoyingly) defensive Archeoaevis, and got the earth crystal jobs.  I was granted the honor of the samurai class (read: yamato damashiiiii), which just about rounds out my capitalism party.  With that in mind, capitalism, ho!

Now, samurais are pretty cool.  They can use katanas, which differ a bit from regular ol’ swords, but they do respectable damage.  Granted, not quite as much as my dual-moonring blade ninja setup, but still a decent amount.  They can take more hits than a ninja can, so it balances out.  Samurai can also randomly block attacks, which makes them survive longer.  Always a benefit.

The samurai’s main draw at this point is Zenigage.  Zenigage basically throws money at every enemy on screen.  It does a ton of damage, but consequently, requires a ton of money, as well.  One boss, for example, was six enemies.  They had about 2200 health each, but one Zenigage did 4500 and dropped them all.  Unfortunately, my wallet went to shambles.  Combine this with my constant breakage of rods, and (less) constant need to throw things at people, and I’ve got myself a shiny money-sink.  If my party happened upon Capital One one day, my party would not be able to give them a satisfactory answer to their infamous question.

My party? No, no it fucking doesn't.

Fortunately, my thief can still steal things, and make some money back.

Well, so my party got the earth crystal, and their fourth job, but our Thief left the party temporarily.  Can’t have a Final Fantasy without a party member leaving, I suppose.  Unfortunately, I need to fight three bosses in a row without him.  You remember how last week I also had to fight several bosses in a row?  Yeah…

Well, I had to go to the four meteorites this time around, and steal some adamantine.  I already pissed off the turtle last week, so I guess that preemptively took care of one of them.  The other bosses were kind of similar.  The first one I faced was against six Purobolos, which I alluded to before.  As you may remember, Zenigage made short work of both them and my wallet.  The next boss was against the summon Titan.  Physical attacks ruled here, though I had to make sure my party was adequately protected first.  Downing him netted me the Titan summon, which is useless.

The last enemy, the Manticore, loved to spam attacks that would affect the entire party.  Doing 250 damage to each party member, I had to constantly spam Cura with two of my party members.  I got him down, but he struck me with a nasty surprise, instantly felling my party the moment he died.  This tactic didn’t work so well for him the second time, though.

Continuing On Our Own (read: the thief doesn't contribute much).

With that, the party teleports to World 2.

Hello, World! 2!

As you can see, there’s not much to do.  All the enemies on the island are piss easy though, and all drop tents.  Hmm, I wonder what the game wants me to do…

You have been waylaid by enemies and must-- oh sorry, wrong game/scenario.

This enemy is geared for getting a quick kill on singular enemies.  However, it didn’t take the ninja’s broken abilities into account.  While the Abductor casts Hurricane to reduce your HP to a single digit value, and try to attack you to swiftly end the battle, ninjas have Image.  Image makes you dodge the next two attacks.  With the simplest of command patterns, this enemy actually went down.  I have no clue what to do next though, since the rest of my party just got abducted.  Guess I’ll chill here for a wh– oh, is that a chest on the world map?  I don’t think I want to open it though.  Can’t do much else though, I’ll just take a quick pee–


Exdeath soon makes his appearance, and basically announces his evil intent to the world.  “Don’t move your forces any closer!  You don’t want me to harm your friends, do you, Galuf?”  Galuf, being the fourth party member that he is, sees through Exdeath’s bullshit and takes his drake up to Exdeath’s castle.  Being that Galuf is still a thief, he pretended he was playing Thief, and tried to sneak to the dungeon.  Hate to break it to him though, but this game isn’t Thief, it’s Final Fantasy, so he gets into a couple of random encounters, instead, soon leading to a choice encounter with the best character in the game.

Dazzling the Dungeon, Dimensional Ninja! Gilgamesh!

Being a thief made this encounter really tough.  I actually had to spam potions.  Fortunately, Gilgamesh… thought of something else that he had to take care of, and took his leave, but not before deciding to settle the score with the party some day!

With that, the party gets rescued from their cell, and the party manages to make it out of the dungeon without much opposition.  Except not really, as the only available path leads to that bridge from Earlier.  A big bridge.  A big bridge where you clash with enemies in a gauntlet to make it to the other side.  Okay, it’s not actually a gauntlet, but I like to pretend it’s one by not opening the menu at any time.  Whatever, here’s some awesome music.

After a few encounters, Gilgamesh ambushes me from behind a door.  Apparently, that day is today.

I'll forgive him for making some shit up about another day, since he has some awesome music.

This encounter’s a lot tougher than his first one, but there weren’t any tricks to this battle.  Soon, he runs away with his tail between his legs aga-

Neverfuckingmind he just buffed himself to oblivion.

After what I may call another ridiculously long battle, Gilgamesh realized that he had something better to do, then proceeded to run off.  Another day, I presume.  Anyway, it looks like the home stretch, both for this pseudo-gauntlet, and for this part.

Too bad I only make it to the end of one of the two.  Some plot bullshit sends me somewhere else, thus dashing any hopes I had of making it to the end of the other.

The True World 2 Starts Here.

And here happens to be the best place to stop.  So I’ll see you faithful readers next week, where I wander aimlessly and try to find out what to do next, but not before realizing I can really only do one thing!

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A mad scientist who's so cool!


A mad scientist who's so cool!

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